“Does he/she like me?” Many people get caught up in overthinking during the flirting phase, interpreting every gesture or word from the other person. The relationship often feels more than just friendship, yet there’s still a fear of misreading the situation. So, how do you define flirting? What behaviors and signs should you look for during this phase? And how can you test the waters or even confirm your relationship status?
What Does “Flirting” Really Mean? And How Does It Feel?
Flirting often describes the phase before a relationship is officially defined. It’s that “more than friends, less than lovers” stage where both people are testing the waters. During this time, you might experience interactions that go beyond typical friendship, such as holding hands, hugging, or even kissing. These moments of closeness can trigger a rush of oxytocin and dopamine in the brain, leading to those butterflies-in-your-stomach feelings. It’s no wonder so many people enjoy the thrill of flirting!
However, overanalyzing these interactions is quite common in a flirtatious relationship. After a while, when one person wants to move forward and clarify the relationship, it’s important to assess each other’s feelings and find a way to encourage the other to take the next step. Be careful not to get too caught up in mixed signals or unclear behavior, as it could lead to unnecessary stress and affect your mood!
How to Define Flirting: Key Signs to Look for During the Flirting Phase
Signs of Flirting from a Guy:
- He often steals glances at you, pays close attention to you, and stays aware of your presence.
- When you’re around, even if he’s talking to others, he might raise his voice, exaggerate his gestures, or choose words meant to catch your attention.
- If he wants to take things further, he’ll drop hints through suggestive comments indicating his interest in dating you.
- A guy who’s into you might seize opportunities for subtle physical contact, like gently touching your head, walking close to your shoulder, or pinching your cheek.
- He finds everything you do adorable, and even when you’re not wearing makeup, he thinks you look stunning!
Signs of Flirting from a Girl:
- When a girl likes you, she’ll openly share her thoughts and even her vulnerable side, hoping to gain your trust and understand you better.
- If she casually initiates physical contact, like resting her arm on your shoulder or tapping you, and doesn’t pull away when you accidentally touch her, she’s likely interested in flirting.
- A girl will reserve special days for those she cares about. If you invite her out, she’ll do her best to rearrange her schedule to make time for you.
- When chatting via text or social media, she’ll keep the conversation going, responding thoughtfully rather than abruptly ending the discussion.
How to Define Flirting: Testing the Waters to Define the Relationship
Flirting can be a rollercoaster of emotions—both sweet and stressful as you constantly wonder if they like you back. When you reach the point where you really want to define the relationship, it’s time to try a few tactics to gauge your crush’s feelings and see where they truly stand.
Test #1: Pretend You’re Not Feeling Well
Someone who likes you will be genuinely concerned about your well-being. If you tell them you’re feeling under the weather, even if they’re not usually quick to respond, they’ll likely reply as soon as possible. They might also check in on you more often or even offer to accompany you to the doctor.
Test #2: Close the Physical Distance
Regardless of gender, if someone is into you, they won’t shy away when you get physically closer. In fact, they might secretly look forward to those intimate moments. For example, during a movie, lean towards them—if they don’t pull away, it’s a positive sign!
Test #3: Ask for a Hug
This move works especially well for women. When you’re feeling down, whether due to work or personal issues, confide in your crush. If they like you, they’ll be there to listen. When you’re at a particularly low point, ask them, “Can I have a hug?” If they’re interested, they won’t hesitate to say yes.
Test #4: Introduce Them to Your Friends
If your crush is also interested, they won’t mind meeting your friends. In fact, they’ll likely put their best foot forward when you introduce them. Even if one of your friends happens to be particularly attractive, your crush will keep their focus on you, avoiding unnecessary eye contact with others.
How to Define Flirting: Why Do Some People Flirt Without Wanting a Relationship?
Before officially dating, flirting helps both parties figure out if they’re truly compatible. A memorable flirting phase can be both exhilarating and nerve-wracking, filled with moments of joy and frustration as you try to decode their feelings. However, being stuck in an undefined relationship can be unsettling, especially when your crush seems reluctant to move forward. Here are some reasons why they might be holding back:
- They’re not yet sure if you’re truly compatible.
- As long as you’re not officially dating, they feel free to explore other options.
- They simply want someone to talk to when they’re feeling down.
- Flirting doesn’t require commitment, which they find easier and less stressful.
- They’re enjoying the current dynamic and fear things might change after dating.
- At the end of the day, they might just not want to date you.
How to Define Flirting: How Long Should You Wait Before Ending the Flirting Phase? Tips to Move On
There’s no set time limit for how long a flirting phase should last—it varies for everyone based on their comfort level and how well they know the other person. If your crush makes you feel secure and loved, it might be time to take the relationship to the next level. But if you’ve been stuck in the flirting phase for a while and things aren’t progressing, it might be time to consider moving on. Here are four ways to break free from an unfulfilling flirtationship and leave behind someone who doesn’t love you enough.
Flirting Breakup Tip #1: Be Direct—Express Your Feelings Clearly
While the early stages of flirting can be exciting, if the flirting phase drags on and you start developing stronger feelings, the best way to clarify your relationship is to be direct and confess your feelings!
Before doing so, make sure you sense that the other person is interested and has been giving you positive signals. If it feels like you’re just one step away from becoming a couple, don’t miss the chance to confess—you might regret it later! And if they reject you, you can focus on healing and won’t have to worry about the uncertainty of the flirting phase anymore.
Flirting Breakup Tip #2: Distance Yourself and Shift Your Focus
If a flirting relationship is draining you, the most effective way to break free is to distance yourself from the person. Limit your interactions and treat it like a breakup—the connection will fade over time.
Then, redirect your energy to other areas of your life, like work, hobbies, or socializing. Gradually, you’ll find yourself moving on from the flirtationship.
Flirting Breakup Tip #3: Focus on Their Actions, Not Their Words
To break the chains of a flirting phase, you need to consciously rescue yourself by objectively analyzing the other person’s actions. Don’t get swept away by sweet talk—observe their behavior instead. Are they reaching out to you? Are there any signs that they want to move forward? Understanding the reality behind your interactions will help you avoid unrealistic expectations.
Flirting Breakup Tip #4: Are You Just a Backup Plan?
In a flirting phase, it’s natural to try to please the other person. But it’s important to test the waters by occasionally saying no to their requests and seeing how they react. If they become impatient or distant, it’s a sign that you might just be their backup plan. Someone who truly likes you won’t let you feel that way, and recognizing this can help you walk away from the flirtationship with confidence.
How to Define Flirting: Drawing the Line Between Friendship and Romance
If you and your flirting partner decide to remain “just friends,” then any gestures that go beyond friendship—like hand-holding or hugging—should stop. By setting boundaries, you might even inspire them to confess if they truly want more. Flirting can be both sweet and confusing, helping you see if the other person is right for you. If they don’t value you enough, it’s best to walk away, even if it’s painful to leave behind shared memories. Facing reality will open the door to finding someone better! But if your flirting partner makes you feel secure and happy, don’t miss out on the chance to build something great together.
